the things people say

I was away last week at a work meeting and of course since it was my first meeting back from Family Leave, everyone wanted to see baby pictures and ask how things were. Many folks at the meeting knew that we had been trying to create our family for the past few years and most by now had known we were adopting....except for one woman, who at lunch after looking at my little, 15 photo, brag book, said, "I remember when you were pregnant." My boss was actually the first one to respond and said, "uhhhh, noooo", trying ever so delicately to cut her off before it got worse, when I just blurted out, "No, I was never pregnant with AM." Well you could have knocked her over with a feather, but I didn't know how to handle that one. I have grown accustomed to folks in the building, who have said, "I don't remember you being pregnant", or distant friends who upon receiving their Christmas Card/Annoucement said, "wow, we have been out of touch... but someone who had remembered I was pregnant!!??? OK, I know I put on a little weight trying to get pregnant but seriously....THAT MUCH??? One of my partners said, that should be incentive to get out of bed and get on the treadmill. Thank you for that AB. I was pretty nonplussed by the comment and had a good laugh telling some of my friends about it.

The other side of the week, had me being knocked over by a feather; in a conversation with my bosses boss who could be a tough guy to communicate with.  I pretty much accosted him in the bar and demanded he see photos of my little girl...no I wasn't drinking. He asked where AM was from and I said Texas, where interestingly enough we were (1 mile from where we awaited our interstate compact), and then he asked if we were going to keep in touch with the birth family. I of course replied, "yes, we currently send photos and a letter each month through our agency, but we also speak to our BM and have long-term plans to stay in touch and have AM meet her, etc. etc. Well, it was my turn to be knocked over with a feather, when he responded that his sister had placed a child for adoption and said, "to this day she knows it was the best decision for her and her daughter because she would never have been able to care for her and raise her at that time." I have to tell you, it gave me such a good feeling to know that somewhere in the sorrow and grieving of placing a child into a chosen family to raise, this woman had found some sort of peace with her choice. I like that happy sounding ending.   

Funny, the things people will say and tell you when you have adopted your child. We could of course do another whole post on the things people ask, but we can save that for another day.

Finally, I have knit AM her first piece of mommy-knit.  It is something I have knitted  for everyone I really like who has had a baby.  I knit her a baby blanket from Vogue Baby Blankets, in a pretty butter yellow. She look so sweet and beautiful in yellow. It will be done this week and I have a cute little hoodie pullover from Artyarns I will start next week.